I'm a Little Curkie

Fallyn burst into song not long ago. . . she's never been much of a singer, or one to make up songs, so this is kinda the first. We jurst lurve hearing the Curkie Song (curkie = cookie with her little accent)!

"Knock knock! Knock knock!

Open the door for me,

'cause I'm a little curkie (cookie)!"

She added a couple verses later that are different every time she sings it, but more or less a version of:

"Kiss me when you see me, 'cause I'm a little curkie! . . . Hug me when you see me, 'cause I'm a little curkie! . . . Don't eat me when you see me, 'cause I'm a little curkie!"

Interview with a Father

As the time draws nearer every day to bring home a toddler, my mind is full sometimes of all the unknowns. . . Realities that many adoptive parents face that we're not exempt from either.

We gotta be honest--our life is a little bit comfortable right now. The kids are a little older and things are relatively "easy" (easy in quotes, because parenting is always difficult!). Some might wonder why we're willing to go to great lengths to choose adoption. . . Why rock the boat?

What if we have a child who needs LOTS of healing because of the traumas in his life? What if attachment/bonding doesn't happen easily? What if our lives will be completely turned upside down? What if his behavior is terrible? What if this will be our hardest child?

Or maybe, he'll be one of those kids who is able to attach, adjust, and heal quickly. Maybe it will be a rather easy adjustment.

Obviously, we can't know yet. But deep down I have a peace that whatever comes, comes, we'll take it one day at a time. This is our child and that's the bottom line. I know I had similar thoughts when I was pregnant both times. . . what if this child is severely disabled? What if they have psychological problems? And on and on. . .

I asked Rick about all that. . . he's never written a blog post so I thought I'd just interview him and dictate his answers. He's a man of few words most of the time. . . doesn't usually just freely purge everything on his mind or his views on serious topics. . . but he always has good things to say when he's prompted. :) So the following that took place in several minutes is probably more words than he's used in one sitting in a LONG time. :)

Rick: I'm in no position to be interviewed right now. [super tired]

Me: You'll be fine. You always have good things to say and it's something our kids can look back on later. [long question from me about unknowns, risks, etc. . . ]

Rick: It's important to consider and understand the possible risks--emotional/behavioral/physical problems. . . it's important to understand the risks in order to "count the cost", and you can't just jump into something this significant unprepared or naive or ignorant. If you do, it's a recipe for disaster for us and the child. But at the same time, once I'm able to fully count the cost, I'm then prepared to say YES to what God has called us to, which may include any or all of those things. To say yes blindly lacks wisdom but to say yes despite the risks shows preparedness.

God is well aware of the effect it will have on all of us. He's not most concerned with us having a life of comfort, so that can't be my priority either. And the pursuit of comfort is not the priority for my family.

Me: What do you hope your children will learn?

Rick: Obedience to God and His glory is the number one priority. . . beyond that--to learn compassion, to think of others, to not make comfort/convenience their priority either, to do what is best for someone else even if it comes at great expense to them.

Me: What other thoughts do you have about the possibility of disrupting our comfort or our children's comfort or our nice, tidy, fairly issue-free family?

Rick: The most growth comes through difficult circumstances. . . in the end hopefully it will be beneficial to all of us. . . . But the addition of any child could disrupt life as we know it. All those same things [counting the cost, etc.] could be said about adding another biological child. We wouldn't be in control of how our DNA combined to form a new child, just like we're not in control of what this child will bring to the table. We know the One who is in control, though. . . God is the creator of us all and sets the lonely in families. We're not called to be tenders of our DNA, we're called to parent the child God has given us.

Me: Why not take care of orphans in a way that is less risky and doesn't have as much cost to count?

Rick: Again, comfort or risk-aversion is not what we're called to in life. If I felt like I could confidently say that God is only calling me to provide financially and let others get their hands dirty, then I would gladly do that because that's what God called me to. But God's made it clear that that's not the role I'm to play for this ONE. . . and we can continue to give in more comfortable ways because He wants us to do that, too.

Your comfort should come from the fact that you are being obedient to what God's called you to. That should be comfortable. It doesn't mean you seek to manufacture hardships for yourself. It means if God's calling you to something and it's a hardship, be comfortable with that discomfort.

Me: So what are you thinking lately when you think of your next little boy?

[I just love the following answer. . . it just shows that at the end of that day, this is Rick's SON and that's the bottom line.]

Rick: um, it'll be fun to play with him, give him attention, love him, provide the basic necessities, introduce him to new things....I'm excited that I'll be able to play with him since he will not be zero. [giggles from me]

Me: What comes to mind when you think about all he's been through?

Rick: I think I can't even comprehend everything he's gone through, and I can't change what he's been through, but I can do all I can to be the best father possible and do all I can to provide what I can for him for the rest of his life.

His history, experiences, and circumstances do not constitute or define or encompass who he is...just like anyone else, he'll have strengths/weaknesses/personality/things he enjoys...and it's the relationship that I'll have with him that will define who is to me. It's only in all of those things within our relationship and my experience with him that I will understand who he is. It's not his physical or emotional or intellectual attributes that constitute my understanding of who he is...it's dependent more upon understanding him in the context of the relationship i have with him. I will be his father and he will be my child and it's not dependent on what strengths or weaknesses he brings to the table, it's dependent on God providing that relationship to me. I'm called to a relationship no matter what characteristics any of my children have.

Me: What comes to mind when you think about how others might view our children or our family?

Rick: It's the relationship that's important...if there is no relationship, someone shouldn't give a flip what a set of facts about him looks like. . . they shouldn't care that he's adopted, that he's black, that he's from another country, his special need, his history, his story...they SHOULD NOT CARE unless there's a relationship. Stereotypes or prejudices exist where relationships don't.

And with that, we're done. Someday my kids can look back on this and get a deeper glimpse into their father's heart, because he doesn't write his thoughts down himself. :) I happen to admire that heart very much, and I'm so glad he's ours!

My Christmas Present {Heart Surgery for Asimba}

Please be praying for a sweet girl in Kyrgyzstan who will receive heart surgery tomorrow!

This was my and my siblings' Christmas gift from my sweet parents. :)

What Can I Teach My Kids About Being Black?

Came across this poem again tonight, written by this amazing mama. If you want, leave some comment-love for the author of this poem either here or on her blog. It's one of the most beautiful things I've read on the topic.

It brought tears to my eyes the first time I ever read it, and now especially as we are near (Lord willing!!!) bringing "B" home.

We've had years of ongoing training, reading, asking questions, etc. on the topic of transracial adoption, but in the end. . .

What Can I Teach You About Being Black? (by Dorothy Bode)

What can I teach you about being Black?
Not much,
Because I'm not.
But I can teach you about pain,
And how to forgive peoples foolish words.
I can show you how to endure suffering,
So that through it Truth will be proclaimed.
I can love you and cry with you,
I can be the she-bear when you are threatened.
We can live where there is a rainbow of people,
and we can learn to love them together.
We can seek out the truth of history,
And not be afraid of the ugliness.
I can open your heart and your eyes
To the painful reality that comes
clinging to the back of sin.

And in the end,
I can release you into your destiny,
And wait for you to come home,
With a fuller understanding of who you are
and what you are to be in your life.
Then I can listen as you teach me,
What it means to be Black.

Shirts - Africa - Adoption - Orphans

Here's a family bringing home two children from Uganda who have great t-shirts they're selling as a fundraiser! Check them out!

My Photographer Friend

Check out these wedding pics my friend took. . . way fun couple and photographer!

And Calvin made the page--he's the dapper fellow holding a giant handful of leaves. . . also sporting his Central Asian vest he picks out for special occasions, which he paired with one of his bow ties. (You can click the pic for bigger)

Sometimes just running errands is a special occasion :)

I wish I had had my camera that day--so glad Emily got a pic of him.

I keep wondering when he's not going to dress himself like that anymore and then I get scared that this might be the last time! :)

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

And the book goes to. . . #21 quilt-n-mama! (I know where to find ya, so I'll email you.)

Check out her blog and her sweet family!

I-600A {Emotional}

Latest step to bring B home. . . got the I-600A sent off last Friday!

Always an exciting step for international adoptions, but it was pretty bittersweet.

Choking back tears as I filled out the paperwork.

Remembering doing this for Kyrgyzstan quite some time ago.

And obviously, still no little person from Kyrg here.

Don't know if there ever will be.

Especially now that there's a big hold-up with getting the waiting kids home. . . a really big one.

I remember feeling a *little* like this when I went in for my very first sonogram when I was pregnant with Calvin, and found out that there had been two babies, and one was gone.

Except that miscarriage seemed a lot less complicated to process.

It hurt a lot, of course, but it was not too difficult to grieve, process, and heal.

All this stuff with Kyrgyzstan just seems so complex to sort through. . . there's so much involved. . . so much at stake. . .so much time, energy, praying, suffering, grieving, hoping, miracles. . . 60+ children and 60+ families who may never be united, so the weight of that is factored in as well, even though we're not matched with a child.

We were "waiting without a referral".

Still have not heard if Kyrg would approve us to accept a referral of a child whose family could no longer continue with Kyrg.

If you've adopted internationally, you know what I mean when I say that the suffering/joy/grief/celebration of families and children of that country you're adopting from is part of your journey, too. . . in a really big way.

Those precious 65 children. . . there just aren't words. . . except to pray, "Please God, even if we never have a child from Kyrg, please just get those 65 home."

Well, anyway, back to the I-600A. . .

Now we'll be waiting on United States Customs and Immigration Services (USCIS) to process our application and supporting documents and send us our fingerprint appointment time.

After all that we'll be issued our I-171H, which is basically the official approval from our government to leave the country and come back with a child to be part of our family.

Please keep praying for little B. . . and for the waiting children in Kyrgyzstan who have been waiting 2-3 YEARS now.

Last Day!

Don't forget to enter the giveaway!

How's your weekend?

Ours has included an accidental 24-oz ingestion of Mountain Dew by our 5-year-old. . . whoops.

Couple hours of running wildly with unceasing sound effects--mostly in and out of the bathroom to style his hair a couple dozen times. Often carrying his "trophy".

First time we've seen him with a sugar or caffeine high--maybe that means we're not *that* bad of parents despite Saturday's incident???

Fallyn is on a road trip with Grandpa Vail (Grandma is in Malawi) to see her cousins for V's 6th birthday.

She's having a ball. . . she ADORES Miss V.

They're a pretty perfect pair. So sweet.

Glad she wasn't here during the Mountain Dew episode.

I'm sure the sibling drama would've been escalated with such a crazy brother.

Delurking {and a Children's Book Giveaway!}

It's Delurking Week, or National Delurking Day or something. . . I'll do a Delurking Weekend with a giveaway, how about that?

Delurking is all about revealing who you are. . . why you read. . . showing some bloggy love by leaving a comment! Comments are the love-language of bloggers and blog readers! :) I know who some of you are but I know I have a lot of "hits" and I don't know where they come from! So I'd love to know who you are.

I'm showing some bloggy love back by entering you in a drawing to win a copy of one of our favorite children's books, which happens to be by someone we know from my hometown! It's called Just Line Around by Kinsy McVay and is simply a fantastic concept! I'll spare a big write-up here and just send you to Amazon to check it out. Read the reviews!

I just found out, too, that you can read it online for a limited time. . . for free!

So leave a comment and introduce yourself, or say hi, or leave me a link to your blog, or say why you read this one, or whatever you feel like saying today! I know my blog isn't anything special and I really don't know what I'm doing most of the time, but thanks for reading anyway!

Your comment will be your entry to win a copy of Just Line Around for your own family or to give as a gift. Or if you really can't think of anyone in your life who can use it--maybe donate it to a library or a classroom! I plan on announcing the winner on Sunday evening!

Perfect! *sniff*

I so want this shirt for our next little guy! Sooo perfect!

I'm quite smitten with my husband and so proud of him and know he's going to be the greatest daddy for little "B". :) This shirt made me tear up a bit!

Nice Little Surprise!

Found out yesterday that a particular step on "their" end already happened, and the next step will be done concurrently with some more of the process!

I thought the next thing we have been waiting on might not even be done till February, and then they'd move on to the next step. . .

We were really excited to hear that some things are being done concurrently and won't be just a succession of events done one after the other! Yay!

Could mean the difference of a few/several weeks!

We just want our boy HOME as soon as possible. . . we want him to be able to have a variety of foods, a daily vitamin, just some simple basic things that we take for granted. . . and of course, all the love and snuggles a little boy should have!!!

We'd appreciate prayers for timeliness on all ends!

Are Kids Without Families "Needy?" {We Belong Together, Todd Parr}

Are kids without families NEEDY? Is it wrong to say that? According to some out there, it seems so. I come across statements a lot online, like, "I never saw my daughter as needy. She didn't need saved, in fact, she saved me."

But I disagree. YES YES YES children are needy! By their very nature, children are NEEDY! And what greater need does any child have than to have a FAMILY? Food...Water...FAMILY. Basic human needs. Does that mean that we have a savior-mentality that says, "Look what I did for you. I rescued you. We provided what you desperately needed. Aren't you simply amazed and grateful and so lucky?" Not at all! We know who the lucky ones are! :) But it seems as though that's what the anti-needy and anti-in-need-of-rescuing side of the debate has a problem with. I might be wrong on that, but that is what I gather the issue is.

I've thought about all that for a looooong time, and thought I'd take this opportunity to finally write about it in conjunction with a review of this children's book on adoption.

We recently bought We Belong Together by Todd Parr, and we really like it! There are a lot of positive review for it, and there are a lot of negative reviews on Amazon. I wrote a review and gave it 5 stars...it's lengthy...but there was a lot I wanted to say!

I know there are some who would disagree with me, but here's my opinion on all this. If you disagree, or agree, I'd love to hear your thoughts. . . whether or not you're an adoptive parent! Leave a (civil) comment if you want and let's discuss!

Here's my review on Amazon:

It's unfortunate to hear harsh criticisms for a great book. Thanks, Todd Parr, for another delightful book!!!

I don't think the book paints a victim-savior picture at all. I think it presents a good, simple picture of adoption. Parents have LOVE to give, children have needs that can be lovingly met, and there is a reciprocal relationship between parents and their children where both are very blessed!!! The words and illustrations in this book give a great picture of that reciprocal relationship. All the parents have big smiles as they are shown doing things with their child which is one simple way this book shows that parents are very blessed by their children!

A child is an immense blessing to his/her parents and there is a beautiful, reciprocal relationship. I personally think that We Belong Together does a good job of showing this. "We belong together because... you needed a home, and I had one to share. Now we are a family!" (accompanied by a picture of a family playing together and having fun together and obviously the parents have joy from being with their children!)

We personally are adopting rather than having more biological children because:
A) We do have desires for a bigger family and take delight in being parents.
B) Because there is a dire NEED in this world for MILLIONS of children around the world to have a family.

It is a FACT that children have needs and that by design, a permanent family is what meets those needs. ALL children are needy! No child can provide for themselves nor have their needs FULLY met without a permanent, healthy family.

I DO feel that children without families are in fact victims as well--innocent victims of unfortunate circumstances in this harsh world that led them to be separated from their biological family and now are in need of a permanent family. Definition of a victim: "One who is harmed by or made to suffer from an act, circumstance, agency, or condition." Acknowledging that children will suffer without a family does NOT mean that we see ourselves as rescuers or saviors or people doing a really awesome good deed. Acknowledging that should drive the world to compassion and sacrifice and generosity. . . and if parents are building their family, it's OKAY to let that be part of their decision of whether to pursue adoption or bring more children into the world biologically. Otherwise, there would be a LOT of families NOT adopting if somehow these kids would be OK on their own.

I do NOT feel that acknowledging that CHILDREN HAVE NEEDS and that adoption does indeed meet their needs, means that adoptive parents think they are saviors or that children should feel grateful to them. Any parent (with bio or adopted children) who feels that their children are there to meet their own needs, or feel that the child needs to be grateful to them has obviously got it wrong. I personally have never come across any adoptive parent who sees adoption that way (I'm sure there are some out there, but surely a very very slim minority), so I don't know why there is such a fuss about acknowledging that children have REAL NEEDS. People have a heart to meet that need--what's wrong with admitting that?

After all, adoption is a mean to provide a FAMILY for a child, NOT to provide a child for a family. If we ever put OUR needs above the needs of a child, we're treading in dangerous waters. Of course that child is a tremendous blessing to the parents and there is much fulfillment and joy in being a parent and it's natural to desire to be a parent, but parents can never put any expectation on a child to meet some sort of "need" of the adult.

I don't think this book says to a child--"You're so needy and look what we did for you!" like some of these comments are saying. Instead, it just presents simple facts of life which are true about ANY child (bio, adopted, without a family, or in a family). Any child needs a home, someone to help them grow, someone to kiss boo-boos, to be read to, and to say I LOVE YOU.

I also want to address the complaints of some of these comments, that it leaves out the birth parents, or leaves out such-and-such. Uhhh...it's a short children's book. There is no way a simple children's picture book is able to address all the ins and outs of adoption. There are many ways through a child's life to talk about birth parents, grief and loss, why some families have 1 parents and some have 2, and some have 2 moms or 2 dads, and other hard topics. I think it's unfair and unreasonable to expect a short children's book to address all of those issues!

This book could definitely provide opportunities for further discussions with your child, though. A child might ask, "Why couldn't my first mom help me 'grow healthy and strong?'" (words from the book) Or, "Why does that girl have two moms?" (also in the book, although if you are not comfortable talking about same-gender parents yet with a very young child, you could easily suggest that maybe that's a single mom and her sister or the grandma.

There is also a page that looks like there are two dads, although one of the parents looks like it *could* be either female or male. It took me a long time to notice that it is likely two males. Again, if there are family structures you don't agree with or want to wait to talk about with your child when they're older, you can make adjustments yourself (even take a sharpie and draw a bow in the one's hair if you want!). All of us parents will have to talk at some point with our children about differences in families, whether or not someone agrees with all those differences. You wouldn't have to avoid this book or be forced into any discussions prematurely. . . it leaves room for tweaking it on your own, in my opinion.

Blood Was Everywhere! {HIV}

I have to say I'm learning first hand that it is true-- I've heard other parents talk about it from time to time--that many people immediately think of HIV/AIDS when they hear about orphans/adoption and Africa especially. And now that I think back, we did get the occasional question about AIDS upon mentioning that we were considering Ethiopia in the beginning, or as time went on that we very likely could adopt from Africa someday.

I don't mind questions when we mention that we're now in process to adopt from Africa--it's a good chance to explain about HIV and adoption!

Common questions lots of adoptive parents get when mentioning Africa, especially:

"How do you know if they have AIDS or not?" Countries that are open for international adoption--not just in Africa--do screenings for HIV (which is not the same as AIDS), TB, Hep B, etc and that's usually part of the medical info you get upon reviewing the referral. Sometimes there are big suprises medically, but usually not with things that are easily detected by a test. If there is a surprise, it's usually something that surfaces later....developmental delays, sensory disorders, etc. Much like biological children...you just never know with some things!

"Was he tested for. . . well, everything?" The implied "everything" usually is hinting at HIV.

"Are you sure he's healthy--could he have something really terrible?" Again, usually implying HIV, and implies a lack of knowledge that children who have access to the right treatment are healthy kids! The majority of people on ARVs (the drugs) have an undetectable viral load, which makes the already hard-to-get virus EXTREMELY hard to transmit, unless you're having unprotected s*x or doing intravaneous drugs. There are other bloodborn viruses you should be more concerned about as far as risk of transmission and the effect of the virus on your body.

And actually, even with unprotected s*x, some experts say that there is ZERO risk of transmission in individuals with an undetectable viral load and who have no other se*ually transmitted infections!

Anyway...

I just love this gal's blog--she always makes me giggle. She's an advocate for HIV adoption and has a good sense of humor.

Read her latest post entitled Blood Was Everywhere and then you can click her link at the bottom to PostivelyAdopted.com (especially Basic Questions about HIV) if you:

*are wondering why blood splattered everywhere in her house was not a big deal.

*haven't been updated on what HIV in America looks like or means today...if you're thinking Magic Johnson, Ryan White, people dying of AIDS...i.e., if you haven't heard much since the 80s or 90s.

*are wondering why lots of HIV adoptions are happening and no one (experts and parents) is worried about transmission in their family.

*are surprised to find out that children with HIV in America should have an indefinite lifespan, live a healthy life, and are not a risk to their siblings, families, communities, schools, etc.

*are surprised to hear that HIV is NOT in saliva, tears, sweat, snot, urine, or feces...ONLY in blood, genital secretions, and breastmilk. That's it.

Have fun navigating around the Positively Adopted site and be prepared to be pretty amazed at how far HIV care has come! I especially like the videos. We were pretty surprised when we first started learning more about HIV when we started our adoption process over 3 years ago. It's one of the special needs you have to check "willing to consider" or "not willing to consider" on your home study, and we needed to learn more about a lot of the things on that list. We quickly realized there's nothing to be scared about, and from a medical standpoint, it's a very manageable condition--easier to manage than many other things we knew could say yes to, such as diabetes.

So why wouldn't we be open to HIV? It just made sense to us to check "willing to consider." The special need with HIV is a need for parents who are willing to advocate, to educate, and to combat ignorance and discrimination. There is no reason for the stigma and fear!

And guess what--there are millions of people walking around the US every day with various bloodborne pathogens! They are in your community, your child's day care, your child's school, your church, your place of work, the YMCA, maybe even your family.

No reason to be alarmed or paranoid for yourself or your children if you're not engaged in risky behaviors! Especially with HIV when you consider undetectable or very low viral loads, and the virus itself being such a fragile/wimpy virus when it's outside the body.

Uganda Orphan Statistics

Here are some Uganda population and orphan statistics I've been googling tonight, compared with U.S. statistics to put it into perspective. . . although how can you really grasp numbers that high??? So sad.

(numbers are approximate)

Uganda is about the same size as Oregon (population 3,800,000).

Population of Uganda: 32,000,000 (Projected 52,000,000 by 2015 and 118,000,000 by 2050)

Population of the United States: 307,000,000

49% of the population of Uganda is under age 15. Highest percentage in the world (comparison chart here).

Number of orphans in Uganda: 2,500,000 = 20% of the child population and 2% of the entire population

Number of children in foster care in the entire United States: 500,000 = .0067 % of the child population and .0016% of the entire population.

"Uganda is one of Africa’s most ravaged regions from the AIDS epidemic. You could say there is a whole generation of parents missing" (from here)

"Over 56,000 children under age 5 die each year from nutrition-related causes. . .

Uganda has the highest proportion of children orphaned by HIV/AIDS worldwide. A conflict in northern Uganda, now in its second decade [this was written some time ago, so Ug is not currently dealing with the LRA as other countries are, but the numbers are still important], has displaced more than 1.8 million people and has resulted in the abduction of more than 60,000 children." (from here)

And Now. . . {Plus Prayer Requests}

. . . here's where we're at--the follow-up to the previous post.

So lots of stuff arrived where it needed to go on Monday the 20th.

Now we are waiting on some minor technicalities before the referral is official. A couple little things like the birth record being transferred to the proper person.

That could take days, or weeks--just depends on timing on the Africa end. We are praying for days, of course! Ready to keep moving forward!

As soon as those little loose ends are taken care of, the official referral-acceptance can be submitted and then we'll be waiting on instructions from UG on exactly what they want in our dossier (the stack of paperwork from us that is submitted to UG).

We can get that done pretty quickly on our end, then it'll be a matter of how long they'll take to review everything. . . then we'll be waiting on a court date to be assigned. That again can go quickly, or could take months.

The court date means TRAVEL TIME!

Prayer Requests:

*For a meeting that's supposed to be happening "in a couple weeks" on their end. . . transfer documents, stuff like that. And they'll be discussing if moving "B" to a different orphanage would be a better option.

*For the attorney to be involved in that meeting, which would kill more birds with one stone.

*Of course, we want this to move as quickly as possible so that more weeks or months don't go by that this sweet little guy has to be without a family. Please pray that things on their end would be accomplished in a timely manner.

*Pray that "B" will be in the best place--that he'll be able to be transferred if that would be the ideal option.

After We Said Yes

Continuing from my previous post about what's going on with our adoption. . .

Found out about "B" on a Saturday, told the case worker that YES we want to move forward the following Tuesday night.

Despite feeling that we should turn in our "YES" that Tuesday night, we know that obedience in adoption hasn't always resulted in a child coming home in the end and God sometimes has other purposes. So we said yes, only knowing that obedience in our life RIGHT NOW, THIS WEEK, meant moving forward and trusting God with what would come and what would happen in the end.

The next big step would be to obtain a country-specific home study. You can't just have a general "international" home study the way you can have a general domestic home study. For the referral (when the "match" is made) to be official, we'd need to turn in an intial application to the new agency (pretty easy), plus have a country-specific home study (probably a good amount of work and time).

Well, we have a current domestic home study, plus a lapsed international home study for Kyrg. And our domestic home study has an April 2011 date on it and will need updated pretty soon itself.

So Wednesday morning, I was full of paperchasing adrenaline and immediately got to work. Even called my mom to see if she could take Calvin to kindergarten and then Fallyn to preschool 45 minutes after that. . . then I'd meet up with everyone at 11:00 am for Fallyn's Christmas program. So Grandma showed up at 8:15 am and I got BUSY.

Called our home study agency (she answered the phone before 8:30 am!) to tell them what the situation was and ask a lot of questions about what we'd need to do. Basically, the earliest we could have a home study for UG would be mid-January. We could get some things ready to go over the holidays and mail them in so that the home study agency was ready to start on things as soon as everyone returned from break. And we could expedite it so that we'd have it by mid-January because typically it'd take even longer.

My heart sunk a little. . .I was hoping something could be accomplished before the holidays since there was about a week left before offices close all over the place, but everyone was already out of the office the day I called (the 15th), already at home finishing their last projects/tasks!!! The executive director of the home study agency was the only one left (that's who I was talking to).

Mid-January seemed so far off. . . but we'd just keep moving forward and keep trusting the Lord's plan and see if we were meant to be B's family.

I talked a little more with the director, and she started saying something that just blew my mind! If you know anything about home studies, expired home studies, home study updates, etc. etc. you'll understand. . . if you know nothing about all that, just believe me when I say that this is pretty much just miraculous. . . She said if we did ABC and XYZ and she herself worked on it, she could have us a UG home study ready to fax to our new agency by MONDAY MORNING.

So, if I could get some things to her by Friday, she'd be working on it and also work over the weekend on it. WOW. As if she's not one of the busiest people on the planet on a given day, let alone holidays, end of the year, when EVERYONE's out of the office. That agency is a big operation folks! They do home studies for people all over Kansas and Missouri, PLUS they're an adoption agency. And she's the executive director of this place!

I had things on our end ready before Friday, actually, except for a fax from our doctor's office which came later but still in time. I got a TON accomplished in the couple of hours I had that Wednesday morning, plus some in the afternoon. It was 3:30 before I realized I hadn't even had anything to eat all day except a Diet Pepsi!

My day was filled with nonstop adoption-related emails, phone calls, copies, faxes, errands, mailings, etc. etc. I only had a few loose ends to tie up on Thursday and Friday.

The director of the home study agency was obviously working a LOT on this for us. . . I'd receive emails from her in the evenings, early mornings, throughout the weekend, and even on Sunday and Sunday evening. And like she said, she had it ready to go by Monday morning!

So our new agency received our home study Monday morning as well as our application I had sent via Priority mail. I think they were surprised and maybe amused at how quickly we got things turned in!

The work that the home study director did gives us enough right now to officially get our foot in the door where we need to be. In a couple months we'll have more to do since things expire in April--background checks, health checks, etc.

I made sure that a floral arrangement was sent to the director before she went home for the holidays that week!!! Best Christmas gift we got to give anyone! :) Although, what she did for us deserves a whole lot more than flowers! She went waaaaaay above and beyond for us!

So. . . Merry Christmas to us, eh??? :)

Next post will explain where we're at now with the process and then it'll be all caught up I think. Maybe no one's still reading this technical mumbo-jumbo at this point. . . It's quite a mouthful, I know. But this is adoption! . . . and this is primarily our record for ourselves and our children, and these details are important and exciting to us!

Thanks to all of you for your prayers, words of encouragement, warm thoughts. . . we've always felt supported and loved by so many throughout our adoption journey!!!

We'd love it if you decided to keep reading or subscribe to our blog--I hope to be caught up soon and list some specific prayer requests soon!